I moved to Portland, OR 3.5 years ago from the east coast of the US to take a job that had a 1-year non renewable contract, but I fell in love with this place and the people in it so my partner and I have schemed all kinds of ways to stay. In the time we’ve been here, we have had our share of friends leave us, to travel abroad, to start prestigious graduate programs, to be closer to their families. It felt tempting to treat our time here as having an expiration date too. But I noticed that I had a couple of friends who openly and fervently talked about how excited they were to put down roots here, who made it clear that they weren’t leaving any time soon. It was subtle pressure on us, yes, but I think gave me the security to know I’d have home and family in these people no matter what the future holds.
Maybe you could do that too! Share with others whose future plans are a question mark about what it has meant to you to commit to this place, and maybe give them a little dose of permission or security to do the same. You can’t pressure them against their will, but sharing about your choice might open up that possibility for these people who are struggling with the same sense of transience you are. Good luck!
I think it's great that you had the courage to start somewhere new and followed your heart, even if it's really hard! thank you for sharing that - I'm also drawn to people who express that they want to stay in London for the next few years and also generally speak positively about London. Sometimes I feel offended when a person who is leaving lists all the bad things about London (maybe to make it easier to leave? I don't know) and I just stand there and think: I'm trying to make a home here😅
This just resonated so much...I live in Edinburgh, a city where most of my dearest friends are from other countries too (EEUU, China, Portugal, France, Germany) and lately everyone is leaving... It's heartbreaking sometimes! 💔
Hello from the north of England! I moved here from California in the midst of lockdown 2021. I can completely relate to you and your thoughts on maintaining friendships. It’s so challenging at times because I’m also a horrible texter and have a hard time balancing my marriage, job, local friends and my own personal time with long distance friends! 🫣 thankfully, many of my American friends and family understand that it’s not always easy to stay in touch 24/7, I get so overwhelmed!! Balance is key though. Meaningful friendships and connections can last a lifetime, even if you don’t keep in touch regularly! London is such an amazing place with so much to do and so many different opportunities. I completely understand how it would be difficult to leave.
thank you for taking the time to share your experience! you're absolutely right, I think we have to be more forgiving when it comes to communication with friends and I'm glad your friends understand this too - sometimes it just takes a while to get back to someone and that's ok! x
My wife and I moved back into London from Kent and are really enjoying life with everything it has to offer - theatre, museums, galleries, restaurants, coffee shops and walking around the different neighborhoods. Our story is that our 2 kids are travelling and at university at the moment, so gave us time to have our own adventure in London :). London can feel like a very transient place, with people from all over the world working here for the experience for a few years, then moving on. We've always worked in London and commuted in. Now we're back here and loving life! Really enjoy your diaries and youTube channel Johanna, great work! Our eldest son is having a wonderful time travelling in Brazil - you can see his travels here - https://www.instagram.com/dansdigitaldiaries/
I just turned 26 and Ive been living in Paris for the past three years after completing my masters here. While I've built quite a solid group of friends during my studies, all of them (and I quite literally mean all of them), have moved away since many of them can't find jobs or there are better opportunities elsewhere. While it breaks my heart, I do believe this is probably common occurrence across everyone living their twenty-something lives. However, I feel like I can't judge since I am moving to London very soon to start a new job, and I'm hoping that I'll be able to establish some stability.
Thank you for sharing this, I'm super interested to hear from people who decided to leave london and how their experience has been! I totally feel everything you described and I think many can relate, it's just a bit of a weird age to be in so I'm hoping to make more stable friendships in my 30s. also totally agree on having a sense of community through social media, that really helps me too😊x
This is so interesting! Having deleted my IG account in May, keeping (low-key) in touch with friends who moved away is the only reason I miss it sometimes!! But I have Substack🧡
I moved to Portland, OR 3.5 years ago from the east coast of the US to take a job that had a 1-year non renewable contract, but I fell in love with this place and the people in it so my partner and I have schemed all kinds of ways to stay. In the time we’ve been here, we have had our share of friends leave us, to travel abroad, to start prestigious graduate programs, to be closer to their families. It felt tempting to treat our time here as having an expiration date too. But I noticed that I had a couple of friends who openly and fervently talked about how excited they were to put down roots here, who made it clear that they weren’t leaving any time soon. It was subtle pressure on us, yes, but I think gave me the security to know I’d have home and family in these people no matter what the future holds.
Maybe you could do that too! Share with others whose future plans are a question mark about what it has meant to you to commit to this place, and maybe give them a little dose of permission or security to do the same. You can’t pressure them against their will, but sharing about your choice might open up that possibility for these people who are struggling with the same sense of transience you are. Good luck!
I think it's great that you had the courage to start somewhere new and followed your heart, even if it's really hard! thank you for sharing that - I'm also drawn to people who express that they want to stay in London for the next few years and also generally speak positively about London. Sometimes I feel offended when a person who is leaving lists all the bad things about London (maybe to make it easier to leave? I don't know) and I just stand there and think: I'm trying to make a home here😅
This just resonated so much...I live in Edinburgh, a city where most of my dearest friends are from other countries too (EEUU, China, Portugal, France, Germany) and lately everyone is leaving... It's heartbreaking sometimes! 💔
it's so sad 🥹 are you planning to stay? x
I think so 💗 this feels like home at the moment!
Hello from the north of England! I moved here from California in the midst of lockdown 2021. I can completely relate to you and your thoughts on maintaining friendships. It’s so challenging at times because I’m also a horrible texter and have a hard time balancing my marriage, job, local friends and my own personal time with long distance friends! 🫣 thankfully, many of my American friends and family understand that it’s not always easy to stay in touch 24/7, I get so overwhelmed!! Balance is key though. Meaningful friendships and connections can last a lifetime, even if you don’t keep in touch regularly! London is such an amazing place with so much to do and so many different opportunities. I completely understand how it would be difficult to leave.
thank you for taking the time to share your experience! you're absolutely right, I think we have to be more forgiving when it comes to communication with friends and I'm glad your friends understand this too - sometimes it just takes a while to get back to someone and that's ok! x
My wife and I moved back into London from Kent and are really enjoying life with everything it has to offer - theatre, museums, galleries, restaurants, coffee shops and walking around the different neighborhoods. Our story is that our 2 kids are travelling and at university at the moment, so gave us time to have our own adventure in London :). London can feel like a very transient place, with people from all over the world working here for the experience for a few years, then moving on. We've always worked in London and commuted in. Now we're back here and loving life! Really enjoy your diaries and youTube channel Johanna, great work! Our eldest son is having a wonderful time travelling in Brazil - you can see his travels here - https://www.instagram.com/dansdigitaldiaries/
I just turned 26 and Ive been living in Paris for the past three years after completing my masters here. While I've built quite a solid group of friends during my studies, all of them (and I quite literally mean all of them), have moved away since many of them can't find jobs or there are better opportunities elsewhere. While it breaks my heart, I do believe this is probably common occurrence across everyone living their twenty-something lives. However, I feel like I can't judge since I am moving to London very soon to start a new job, and I'm hoping that I'll be able to establish some stability.
Loved reading this article thank you <3
Thank you for sharing this, I'm super interested to hear from people who decided to leave london and how their experience has been! I totally feel everything you described and I think many can relate, it's just a bit of a weird age to be in so I'm hoping to make more stable friendships in my 30s. also totally agree on having a sense of community through social media, that really helps me too😊x
This is so interesting! Having deleted my IG account in May, keeping (low-key) in touch with friends who moved away is the only reason I miss it sometimes!! But I have Substack🧡